The Unsung Hero of Stress Management: Your Breath

Did you know your brain, which weighs just three pounds, demands 20% of your blood’s oxygen supply? This essential organ thrives on oxygen, yet few of us consider how we’re breathing as we rush through our days. Here’s a surprising truth: the way you breathe affects far more than your oxygen levels—it’s a direct line to managing your stress.

As a healthcare practitioner, even I overlooked the power of breathwork for years. Breathing seemed so automatic, so basic, that I didn’t recognize its potential as a tool for calming the mind and body. But the more I explored it, the more I realized: breath is the unsung hero of stress management, heavily misunderstood and underutilized.

The Science of Breath and Stress

Breathing patterns are directly tied to your body’s nervous system. When you breathe quickly or shallowly—as we often do when we’re stressed—your body activates the sympathetic nervous system, also known as the fight-or-flight response. This signals to your brain that you’re in danger, even if you’re just stuck in traffic or late to a meeting. Over time, this kind of breathing can make you feel chronically anxious.

On the other hand, slow, deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation. Think of it as your body’s “rest-and-digest” mode, a state where you feel safe and calm. By simply changing the way you breathe, you can shift your body from a state of stress to a state of ease—no medication, no fancy equipment, just your breath.

Why Breath Matters More Than You Think

Breath isn’t just about survival—it’s about thriving. Your breath sends constant signals to your body and brain, acting as a bridge between your conscious and subconscious mind. By learning to control your breath, you’re not just oxygenating your body; you’re also gaining a tool to:

• Lower your heart rate

• Reduce cortisol (the stress hormone) levels

• Improve mental clarity and focus

• Enhance emotional regulation

What’s remarkable is how quickly these effects can take hold. A single minute of focused breathing can calm your racing mind and help you regain control in stressful moments.

The Problem with Accessory Muscle Breathing

Many people, often without realizing it, use their accessory muscles to breathe instead of their diaphragm. These accessory muscles include the neck (scalenes), shoulders (trapezius), and chest muscles (pectoralis minor). While these muscles are designed to assist during physical exertion or distress, relying on them for everyday breathing is inefficient and can lead to problems.

Why It Happens:

• Stress and Anxiety: Stress activates the sympathetic nervous system, leading to shallow, rapid breathing (also called chest or thoracic breathing). This often engages the accessory muscles.

• Poor Posture: Sitting for long hours, especially with slouched shoulders, compresses the diaphragm, making it harder to use effectively. As a result, the body compensates by relying on accessory muscles.

• Habitual Breathing Patterns: Over time, shallow breathing becomes a default pattern for some people, even when they’re at rest.

Why Diaphragmatic Breathing is Better:

The diaphragm is a large, dome-shaped muscle designed for efficient, deep breathing. It allows for better oxygen exchange and helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system (the calming side of the nervous system). In contrast, accessory muscle breathing is less efficient and can lead to fatigue, tension in the neck and shoulders, and even feelings of anxiety due to insufficient oxygenation.

How to Tell if You’re Using Accessory Muscles:

• Visual Cues: Watch for movement in the shoulders and chest rather than the abdomen during inhalation.

• Physical Symptoms: Complaints of neck or shoulder tension and fatigue can be a sign of over-reliance on accessory muscles.

• Breath Quality: Rapid, shallow breathing is another indicator.

Simple Breathwork Exercises to Get Started

If you’re new to breathwork, don’t worry. These simple techniques are easy to learn and can be done anywhere:

1. Box Breathing

This method is great for grounding yourself in moments of stress. Here’s how it works:

• Inhale for 4 seconds

• Hold your breath for 4 seconds

• Exhale for 4 seconds

• Hold your breath for 4 seconds Repeat this cycle for 1-2 minutes, and notice how your body begins to relax.

2. Diaphragmatic (Belly) Breathing

Most of us breathe shallowly into our chest, but belly breathing taps into your body’s relaxation response:

• Place one hand on your chest and the other on your abdomen.

• Inhale deeply through your nose, allowing your belly to rise while keeping your chest still.

• Exhale slowly through your mouth, letting your belly fall. Practice this for 5 minutes to feel more centered and calm.

3. Coherence Breathing

This method involves equal-length inhales and exhales, which helps synchronize your heart rate and breathing:

• Inhale slowly through your nose for 5-6 seconds.

• Exhale gently through your mouth for the same count. Aim for about 6 breaths per minute and notice the sense of balance it brings.

How to Make Breathwork a Daily Practice

The key to unlocking the benefits of breathwork is consistency. Start by integrating it into your daily routine:

• Morning Reset: Begin your day with 5 minutes of diaphragmatic breathing.

• Midday Pause: Use box breathing during lunch or between tasks to recenter yourself.

• Evening Wind-Down: Practice coherence breathing before bed to promote restful sleep.

Breathwork doesn’t need to feel like another item on your to-do list. Think of it as a moment to reconnect with yourself amid the busyness of life.

Breath: The Tool You Always Had

Breathing is so fundamental that we take it for granted, yet it holds incredible power to transform how we manage stress. By slowing down and paying attention to your breath, you’re telling your body that it’s safe, and in doing so, you’re reclaiming control over your emotional and physical well-being.

So, the next time life feels overwhelming, remember: your breath is always with you, ready to help you find calm. All you need to do is pause and breathe.

Breathwork can be a transformative tool for managing stress, but everyone’s journey is unique. What breathing techniques have you tried before? How have they helped you find calm or clarity? Share your experiences in the comments below—we’d love to hear from you!

Trauma and Chronic Stress: Healing Big and Little Wounds

When we think of childhood trauma, it’s often the big, earth-shattering events that come to mind—the kind that forever alters someone’s life in an instant. These are often referred to as Big T Trauma, such as neglect, losing a parent, being physically/sexually abused, having a serious illness, or being in a life-threatening situation. But trauma isn’t always loud and obvious. In fact, adults who have suffered through Little t Traumas often feel like they do not deserve to even talk about it as it is not as significant.

The truth is, whether childhood trauma is big or small, it matters—and it matters deeply when it comes to the development of chronic stress. In this blog, we’ll delve into how both Big T and Little t Trauma shape our nervous systems, contribute to chronic stress, and impact our overall health. In this blog, we’ll examine how both Big T and Little t Trauma influence the nervous system, contribute to chronic stress, and impact overall health. Let’s explore these connections and their significance.

What Are Big T and Little t Trauma?

Big T Trauma

Big T Trauma refers to experiences that are overtly threatening to one’s safety or life. These events often leave a clear imprint on the brain and body, making them easier to identify and diagnose. Examples include:

• Neglect (physical or emotional)

• Abuse (verbal, physical, or sexual)

• Loss of a parent

• Illness or significant medical events

Big T Trauma can lead to conditions like Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), where the nervous system remains locked in a state of fight, flight, or freeze long after the event has passed.

Little t Trauma

Little t Trauma, on the other hand, involves events that are less dramatic but still deeply distressing to a child. These experiences might not threaten physical safety but can significantly impact emotional well-being. For instance, a child who grows up with constant criticism may develop anxiety or perfectionism as an adult, unaware of how these early experiences shaped their tendencies. Examples include:

• Being chronically criticized or bullied

• Feeling pressured by a parent to perform a certain way

• Feeling unloved and unaccepted

• Lack of emotional support or being told you’re “too much”

Little t Trauma often accumulates over time, creating a chronic state of stress and tension in the body that is unbeknownst to the person. While it may not lead to full-blown PTSD, it can manifest as hypervigilance, emotional reactivity, anxiety, depression, or present as chronic headaches, digestive issues, or chronic pain.

Why All Trauma Matters

Source: 70/30 Campaign – Empowering Communities to Protect Our Children. Visit www.70-30.org.uk for more information

The Nervous System Doesn’t Differentiate

One of the most important things to understand about trauma is that the body’s nervous system doesn’t differentiate between Big T and Little t experiences. Whether the stress comes from a life-threatening event or a series of subtle emotional wounds, the body responds the same way: by activating the stress response. If the emotions associated with the trauma aren't adequately processed, the nervous system can get stuck in a state of hyper-vigilance (fight or flight) or shutdown (freeze).

When we mentally replay traumatic experiences, our nervous system doesn’t know the difference between remembering and reliving—it reacts as though the event is happening again, unintentionally retraining itself to stay in a heightened state. Over time, this can result in the body taking over the loop so that when you experience events that remind you of your traumas, symptoms begin to present themselves even if your conscious mind does not recognize the trauma. This dysregulation can lead to chronic stress and the chronic secretion of stress hormones that impact physical health, emotional resilience, and even cognitive function.

Accumulation of Little t Trauma

While a single instance of Little t Trauma might not seem significant, repeated exposure to these stressors can create a cumulative effect. Imagine carrying a backpack where each minor stressor adds a small stone. Over time, that backpack becomes unbearably heavy, even though no single stone felt overwhelming on its own.

The Link to Chronic Stress

Both Big T and Little t Trauma are significant contributors to chronic stress, which is a major risk factor for a range of health issues, including:

• Heart disease

• Autoimmune disorders

• Digestive problems

• Sleep disturbances

• Mental health conditions like anxiety and depression

Healing the Body That Remembers

Trauma lives in the body, even if the events are in the past. The emotions generated from that trauma and the story we tell ourselves to make sense of the trauma is often what keeps us trapped in the loop. When we recall those events in our heads, our brains and nervous system create the same chemicals and neurotransmitters as if we are reliving that trauma again. The body becomes a canvas of those events when we bring them up in our minds over and over again. As Dr. Bessel van der Kolk says, “The body keeps the score.” However, healing requires more than just “thinking” your way out of it—it involves addressing the body, the emotions, and the mind together. Here are some approaches to consider:

1. Somatic Practices

Modalities like yoga, somatic experiencing, and breathwork help release trauma stored in the body. They focus on reconnecting with physical sensations of the body without tying it to any narrative or judgment. Learn to build a sense of safety by allowing yourself to hold space for this human experience.

2. Therapy

Therapies like Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and trauma-focused counseling can help process both Big T and Little t Trauma. Find experts who are skilled in helping you process your trauma.

3. Mindfulness and Meditation

Practices like mindfulness meditation can help calm the nervous system and bring awareness to patterns of stress and reactivity. However, for some trauma survivors, traditional meditation may feel overwhelming at first, so it’s important to approach it gently.

4. Supportive Relationships

Healing often happens in the context of safe, supportive relationships. Whether through close friends, family, or support groups, feeling seen and heard can be profoundly healing.

5. Breathwork

Here are two of my favorite breathwork exercises to help you regulate your nervous system and create space between triggers and your emotions. These techniques engage the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation and helps manage stress responses. Emotions typically last only a few minutes when fully felt; however, they can linger much longer if tied to a story. These exercises can help you gain some control over your emotions:

• For Anxiety:

• Coherent Breathing:

• Inhale for 6 seconds.

• Exhale for 6 seconds.

• Effect: Harmonizes heart rate variability, reducing anxiety and increasing emotional resilience. I like to imagine a ball of light rising from my spine to the space between my eyes as I inhale and exhale.

• When to Use: For general anxiety management or as a daily practice.

• For Anger:

• Physiological Sigh (For Intense Emotions):

• Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds.

• Exhale slowly through your nose or mouth for 6–8 seconds.

• Effect: Activates the parasympathetic nervous system, helping you release the heightened energy of anger.

• When to Use: During or after an anger-inducing event to calm down and regain control.

Conclusion: Trauma Is Trauma

Whether it’s Big T or Little t, trauma matters. Both forms of trauma leave imprints on the body and mind, shaping how we experience the world and interact with others. Recognizing the impact of all forms of trauma is the first step toward healing and breaking free from the cycle of chronic stress.

If you’ve ever felt like your pain doesn’t “qualify” because it wasn’t a major event, know this: your experiences are valid, and your healing journey matters. You are worthy of care, attention, and the time it takes to reclaim your sense of safety and peace.

Interested in learning how to manage chronic stress? Explore our related blogs on breathwork and gut-brain connection.